Crime & Punishment

 
 

The 300 Billion ISK heist I almost wish I didn’t pull off.

Author
Gallente Federation
#1 - 2017-05-18 18:27:02 UTC
Almost sixteen months ago today I found myself feeling rather poor. Scrolling through the killmails in the Bringing Solo Back channel I was forever envious of the so called “Amamake Police” and their fleet of Alliance Tournament ships. These were hundred billion ISK ships that they would fly around in the same casual manner that you or I would fly a T1 destroyer. I wanted to be in that club, and I wanted to pull an almighty smash and grab.

There was however a problem… a pretty big one… I was terrible at PVP! Regardless I was determined to prove myself to these people and earn my way into their ranks. I fit up an Omen Navy Issue (because that’s what Elite PVP’ers fly right?) and set destination to Amamake.

I was swiftly turned into an egg by the one and only Tikktokk Tokkzikk… My first encounter had not gone very well.

Undeterred I returned a week later in a Keres (because that’s what Elite PVP’ers fly right?). Casper24 called out in BSB for help engaging a small FW gang, I swiftly piped up “my Keres is at your command good sir”. Good Fights ensued and I was in! I was in the big boys club!

“let me invite you to our pub chat”

A month or so went on and my chance to really prove myself came about. I was able get a hold of Big Miker’s Fiend fit resulting in this kill https://zkillboard.com/kill/51797738/. From that point I was no longer just a random pubbie, I was a King Of Lamaa, an Officer of the Amamake PD!

Next problem. These guys would pass around their AT ships like a cheap joint, but only in a mutual trade. A Caedes for a Chremoas, a Moracha for an Imp, no problem, but you don’t get something for nothing, this was a pay to play club; the price of admission ? 1 Alliance Tournament vessel.

I bit the bullet, grinded hard and bought the cheapest, shittiest AT frig I could find for sale, a Whiptail (Watch me Nae Nae). Additionally I splurged on a Hel supercarrier as a Christmas gift, all to fit in with the whole ‘baller’ thing they had going on.
I then did probably the scariest thing I have ever done in my EVE career. I traded Tikktokk Tokkzikk my shiny new Whiptail and asked for nothing in return, breaking the trend of mutual trades.

“Don’t loose it plz, and don’t get more kills in it than I have” – Samantha Myth

He did get more kills in it than I did…. A week later though it “unfortunately” had to be sold for an offer I simply couldn’t refuse (I actually did get a really good sale price for this ship). It had served is purpose, I could now reasonably ask to borrow Tikk’s pride and joy, a Chremoas (M i n i H u n t r e s s) adorned in over 400 killmarks. Common curtesy would dictate that he lend it to me for nothing in return just the same as I had done for him a week earlier.

“I have a really bad feeling about this, don’t pull a Sam Fox” – Tikktokk Tokkzikk

The contract went up and I had my rental Chremoas for the next week. Two days later and I was hanging out in Amamake with Casper24 and the rest of the gang, I decided to push my luck asking if I could try out an Imp (The Nepal Project)
“Oh sure trade me the Whiptail and you take the Imp see which one you prefer”

“Sold the Whiptail :<”

“…Ahh never mind take it, don’t pull a Sam Fox”

Ten Minuets later and both ships, along with a collection of officer modules and an insanely expensive officer fit panther were on a Jump Freighter (the jump Freighter was also not mine) on their way to Jita. Mission Accomplished

At the time of you reading this none of the involved victims are aware they have been robbed, and so you, dear R/EVE reader are here finding out and reading along with them.

Tikktokk – You are the best pilot in the entire game, hands down, no questions asked! You were a good comrade and hopefully you will make an even greater nemesis.

Casper – A rare and genuinely good human being, not to bad at dogpiling unfortunate T1 frigates that come through Amamake either. Lucky you have big daddy Bluemelon to make it rain AT ships all over you anyway, can’t say I feel too bad here!

Koral – Thanks for the Jump Freighter It was put to very good use.

This was a hard one to pull off and I have got to say I almost wish I didn’t, I almost became emotionally attached to my victims. But this is EVE and this is the role that I play.

“Don’t get soft on me now *****” – Optimo Sebiestor

TL/DR
Became an elite PVP’er and stole some AT ships. GHSC strikes again and the trophy cabinet grows
http://imgur.com/a/9wCV9
WE FORM V0LTA
#2 - 2017-05-18 18:30:29 UTC
Who would you trust someone named Samantha Myth?
Caldari State
#3 - 2017-05-18 21:45:45 UTC
Sam Fox ... Samantha Myth... obviously just a mythological coincidence!

"Never not blob!" ~ Plato

Warped Intentions
#4 - 2017-05-18 22:00:25 UTC  |  Edited by: Shawn en Tilavine
If you're feeling that bad and wish to find absolution, feel free to send me 100 mil ISK, and you shall have it. Smile
I'm a bit ISK-strapped these days myself.

"The world ain't fair, there is no Santa Claus, and not everyone gets a F'n trophy just for showing up. Welcome to the real world. Welcome to Eve."

Amarr Empire
#5 - 2017-05-19 00:26:26 UTC
Shawn en Tilavine wrote:
If you're feeling that bad and wish to find absolution, feel free to send me 100 mil ISK, and you shall have it. Smile
I'm a bit ISK-strapped these days myself.

Surely you mean 100 bil?

A signature :o

#6 - 2017-05-19 01:55:43 UTC
This hardly qualifies as a heist.

Where are the tears of rage? Where is the shaking of fists? Threats of legal action? The obligatory Metric Tons Of Salt (tm) ?

Meh.

Straight

Everything in EVE is a trap.

And if it isn't, it's your job to make it a trap...:)

You want to know what immorality in EVE Online looks like? Look no further than Ripard "Jester" Teg.

Chribba is the Chuck Norris of EVE.

#7 - 2017-05-19 04:08:23 UTC
Ill give you props when you infiltrate the CFC, get high up in their leadership and the literally unanchor all the things, empty the corp wallet, take all the blueprints, modules, ships, and disband the alliance.

Getting a ship or two that (while extremely rare) were practically handed to you isn't much of a heist.
Minmatar Republic
#8 - 2017-05-19 08:12:22 UTC
Xianax wrote:
Ill give you props when you infiltrate the CFC, get high up in their leadership and the literally unanchor all the things, empty the corp wallet, take all the blueprints, modules, ships, and disband the alliance.

Getting a ship or two that (while extremely rare) were practically handed to you isn't much of a heist.


Your jelly isn't leaving much room for salt.
#9 - 2017-05-19 14:53:04 UTC
Never, ever trust anyone in EvE. Not ever. This is precisely why.

Nice earn 'n burn OP.

Mike Adoulin wrote:
This hardly qualifies as a heist.

Where are the tears of rage? Where is the shaking of fists? Threats of legal action? The obligatory Metric Tons Of Salt (tm) ?

Meh.

Straight

Tears don't make the heist. The planning, the execution, and the loot do.

Tears make the story.

Relatively Notorious By Association

My Many Misadventures

I predicted FAUXs

Warped Intentions
#10 - 2017-05-19 16:57:40 UTC
Shallanna Yassavi wrote:
Shawn en Tilavine wrote:
If you're feeling that bad and wish to find absolution, feel free to send me 100 mil ISK, and you shall have it. Smile
I'm a bit ISK-strapped these days myself.

Surely you mean 100 bil?



Aw Crap!! Of course I did!! Big smile
That's what I get for responding late at night when I should be sleeping instead of flying around in space. Let's just call it Temporary Eve Insanity. Yeah, that's it...that'll work.

Of course, when the 100 Bil hits my account, I will promptly forward 10 Bil to you for setting me on the proper path.

Thanks!!

"The world ain't fair, there is no Santa Claus, and not everyone gets a F'n trophy just for showing up. Welcome to the real world. Welcome to Eve."

Vendetta Mercenary Group
#11 - 2017-05-20 10:58:34 UTC
Hahahaha

Well now prep up for whatever it is to come. In some cases (rare ones) no amount of isk is worth betraying or backstabbing your buddies, especially if it feels good playing with them. The social component is the most important thing in Eve...for me.
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