Your post really resonated. You sound like the kind of player who fits perfectly into the culture we have.
You mentioned being a new dad with limited but consistent gaming windows. Both of our corps respect that real life comes first. Nobody here expects you to respond to endless pings or spend your evenings in mandatory fleets.
We run two options depending on what kind of space you prefer:
Embellishment (High Sec)
A smaller, tight knit high sec group focused on relaxed gameplay, helping newer players build their income, mission running, industry, and smaller scale content. Zero pressure and no noise. Great for someone still learning the ropes or wanting chilled evenings without commitments.
Black Rose (Null Sec)
A null corp that values smaller scale gameplay within a community that cares more about people than pings. No pressure to join fleets. No expectation for daily presence. If you want to learn null, make ISK without stress, and still have that small gang feel, this is a great home. The vibe is supportive, social, and calm. Exactly the opposite of the alliance spam overload you described.
You sound like you want a corp that feels like logging in to friends, not logging into a job. That is precisely the environment we keep for our members.
Happy to help you find the right fit, whether that is chilled high sec life or low pressure null where you can still grow without drowning in fleet pings.