o7 Capsuleers,
In order to ensure that new players are being brought up to PvP standards for the coming nullsec conflicts, it will be our policy to keep all pilots well trained through our program of Special High Intensity Training (S.H.I.T.). We are trying to give our pilots more S.H.I.T. than anyone else.
If you feel that you or your corporation do not receive your share of S.H.I.T., please contact your FC or alliance coordinator. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list, and we will do our best to ensure you get all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.
Newbros who don’t take their S.H.I.T. will be placed in Divisional Oversight and Governance programs (D.O.G. S.H.I.T.). Those who fail to clean up their D.O.G. S.H.I.T. will require Capsuleer Aptitude Training (C.A.T. S.H.I.T.). Since our FCs took S.H.I.T. before they were promoted, they don’t have to do S.H.I.T. any more, and are all full of S.H.I.T. already.
If you are interested in contributing to fleet readiness, you may be interested in Fitting And Theorycrafting (F.A.T. S.H.I.T.). Alliance coordinators will be lining up to dump a load of S.H.I.T. on you.
Those who are full of S.H.I.T. will get the S.H.I.T.iest jobs, and can apply for promotion to Director of Intensity Programming (D.I.P. S.H.I.T.).
If you have further questions, please direct them to our Head Of Training, Special High Intensity Training (H.O.T. S.H.I.T.).
Fly safe,
Central Recruitment and Alliance Planning (C.R.A.P.)