Achurans and Internalized Achuraphobia

Nearly every Achuran on the Intergalactic Summit has internalized Achuraphobia.

Abandoning the ways of your people, you embrace your conquerors and oppressors — the Caldari.

A Cold Wind blows dust across the shrines where your ancestors sleep; vines grow there.

You press your blue Caldari uniforms everyday; moths eat the kimonos you put in a drawer that you never open.

Your children do not know how to write with the brush and inkstick; the rough speech of Jita falls from their lips.

SuVee smokestacks darken and boil your homeworld; the snow on the Three Holy Mountains has melted.

The cherry trees are hewn down; a mall selling SuVee things is in their place.

Arise Achurans! The True Emperor comes quickly. The CEO of SuVee will kneel before you and you will pluck out his eyelashes.

Just in case there is some Achur to whom this even needs saying: this message on the evils of Caldari imperialism is brought to you by an eager would-be imperial conqueror who means to take away our gods and replace them all with his own bloodline-obsessed deity.

He’s trying to divide so as to weaken. I’m not sure what that says about his understanding of State demographics but either way this is a would-be conqueror’s attempt to destabilize our home.


Gods and spirits is it any wonder we broke ties with the Empire? Its one thing when their loyalists subvert the security of our people then spread hilariously tone-deaf propaganda, but its a whole other level of insulting how egregiously inaccurate they are when they do so.

Lets set the record straight. Archurian spiritualism is not only alive but vibrant and respected within the State. The Elder Visionaries enjoy a protected status as the largest non-corporate autonomous civilian government, a privilege granted to them specifically to preserve their monasteries and heritage. If anything this perfectly illustrates the lengths at which the State has tried to syncretize the Archur and Caldari way of life through shared cultural appreciation. In fact, many believe that Caldari Wayism and Achur spirituality are fully culturally compatible and view the protection of one as part of a shared struggle to preserve the other.

Also kimonos are decidedly Raata-era Caldari attire. And Achur cherry trees weren’t “hewn down” to make way for SuVee malls. Zakura Hansei are a Gallente tree introduced to Caldari Prime after First Contact and became a Caldari symbol of corporate prosperity afterward. If anything, I’m certain Sukuuvestaa introduced rows of cherry blossoms in corporate parks where the Achur working class spend their leisure time or gather during the Red Stargazing festival.

You don’t know how they worship, how they celebrate, how they live, or how they love. The fact that the only accurate piece of Achur culture you’re able to recite is their ceremonial brush gives the whole game away. You’ve remembered and fetishized their one piece of “barbarous” culture that searing imperialists like you love to display in your museums after you’ve raised a peoples world to ash, polishing your monocles and harrumphing over your spiced wine about how “these strange natives used to live before we civilized them!” It betrays the sickness at the heart of the Amarr mentality and how they really view anyone not yet “tamed” by their Reclamation.

The JSL labor movement remains united with our Achur comrades who make up a large share of the Sukuuvestaa working class. While we have our different customs, we are all State Workers dedicated to supporting eachother against all imperialist encroachment. Whether it is on Caldari Prime or Saisio, wind does not bow.

With respect, ma’am, this isn’t a loyalist to the Empire-- quite the opposite. He’s a heretic. He cast aside the Amarr faith because it wasn’t … well, conquest-y enough for him.

He puts his own accursed ego ahead of the dictates of both faith and duty. Please be aware that the cause best-served if you mistake him for actual Amarr, is his own.


There also remains the significant factor that many often forget, in that, ‘Achur Culture’ even after contact with the State and SuVee remains a varied beast, dependent heavily on regional planetary zones… the Achur of the central mountains are quite different from the Achur of the coasts, or the Achur of the plains, or archipelagos. The spiritualities and beliefs are labeled as broadly Achur, but they are often distinct, even if sharing a similar root.

Though I may not have been born on Achura, its always been a spot of some fascination for me.

It well could easily be said about much the rest of the cluster’s varied cultures, even the State and Megas aren’t especially monolithic under basic scrutiny.

Not to mention the many, many, many different takes on Achur spirituality.

We may all live under the Elder Visionaries’ oversight, but the “thousand sects” have been probably an undercount for … a long time.

O Achuran! Stop licking the boots of your Caldari oppressors for just a moment and consider this: Why did the Caldari leave you your gods even as they plundered everything else?

Because your Gods are weak.

Woo woo philosophical monism everything is one big totality blah blah blah — no resistance to Caldari oppression can be based upon this.

The Achuran people need a strong God. A God who makes distinctions. A God who divides the universe into Us versus Them. Good Versus Evil. Sefrim versus Molok. Free versus slave.

This God exists — the Amarr God. And soon, very soon, he is restoring a True Emperor to the Throne. And this True Emperor will invite the Achuran people to join the Reclaiming voluntarily, like the Khanid before them. And together, we will overthrow the Caldari and the Achuran people will replant their cherry trees and worship God under them.

Even so, may the True Emperor come quickly. Amen. Amarr Victor.

NB for observers: the “Amarr God” he’s talking about is his version who definitely isn’t a product of his cursed pathological ego but just coincidentally agrees with him about everything.

So, like I said. . . .

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It is sad, Aria, that you have taken the lead in licking the boots of your Caldari oppressors, given that you are otherwise a role model for the Achuran people: you completely ignore Caldari culture and customs in favor of native Achuran ones, despite being half-Caldari yourself. More Achurans should imitate Aria — turn your back on Caldari ways and embrace being Achuran.

Can’t believe I got up at the asscrack of dawn to read this trash

What’s wrong with having shopping malls and using a computer to make words, these are traditions which stretch back thousands of years, get out of your pod and live in the desert with a stick and poke at bits of mud if technology offends you that much

Oh but wait they have shopping malls even in the Amarrian desert now, you probably still wouldn’t be happy. Frothing at the mouth at the register ‘why are you using electronic money what about your heritage’

Spare us, gramps



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Well, I for one think mr. Nauplius does have a point when he says megacorps like SuVee do not care one ounce about the religious beliefs of Achurans who still live in the mountain villages and monasteries far away from the big trade hubs.

Megacorps do pretend to care about Amarr faith… but it makes me wonder if they only do that out of concern for profit, because we are so much richer and more powerful, and provide the State with gracious loans.


Well, even a broken clock is right twice per day.

Because one should respect other people doing what they want to do within their own territory. That includes their ways.

Would you like to lick my boots, Mr. Nauplius? Or would you prefer them to be applied to opposite side your body, with elevated kinetic energy application?

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