News reaches Gutter Press that Federation Customs have discovered that several of the names on their foreign smugglers lists are in fact not persons, but data entry errors !
Federation Customs monitors all points of entry for foreign shipping importing and exporting goods, making sure that all goods conform to Federation standards, and the paperwork is in order.
During routine stop & search operations, the names of ships and their captains are recorded and entered into the Customs database, allowing suspicious vessels to be more easily monitored.
A yearly data search by Customs following the new year revealed that several names were apparently responsible for some 30% of all shipping offences occurring on the Federation-Republic border.
Some of the names had shipping offence records going back several decades.
This year however, it was discovered by data analysts, that the vast majority of the “smugglers” were in fact Thukker Trade Language terms.
The most prolific of the “offenders”, turned out to be called “Captain’s Licence” in the Thukker trade language, with “Pilot’s Certificate” and “Masters Charter” not far behind.
The lists of suspect vessels was also found to be full of data entry errors, with “Spaceship” being the apparent “name” of the most frequently stopped trade vessel.
Federation Customs admitted that due to incompatibilities between Federal and Republic systems, manual entry of data is sometimes necessary by Customs officers, and that this mistake was not spotted due to the lack of Customs officers familiar with the Thukker Trade Language.
A Federation Customs officer known to Gutter Press had this to say: “Frankly, this is embarrassing. We thought there was some huge organised smuggling operation, and it turns out to be a translation mistake ?”
A Thukker Caravan representative said this: “Ahahaaahaaa. Amusing. Say, want to buy some genuine Mikramurka sun melons ?”
An exotic dancer working at the Core Complexion station in Deltole said: “Well, that explains a few things.”
A captain from TransStellar Shipping said: “I’m surprised it wasn’t the fault of capsuleers, given how fond they are of silly names”
Gutter Press. News.