"A-Are these neural boosters?!" [Serpentis One-Shot]

[Serpentis One-Shot]

“The Serpentis Corporation is quite aware of the many many misconceptions that plague our reputation… In people’s heads we’re likely a venomous conglomerate of drug dealers that push dimebags of narcotics laced with fentanyl onto schoolchildren and deal in mold ridden alleyways while speaking in cryptic slang… The reality that many will ignore is that we’re a pharmaceutical company no different than say… Porque Pharmaceuticals… We research and develop all kinds of new technology in the field of biochemistry and our clientele can be downtrodden rabble rouse to powerful and influential people like holostars, politicians, Holders and athletes… The Federation can try all they want to get rid of us… But the people of New Eden, need us.”

  • Valdar Vasi

“A-Are these neural boosters?!”

March 12th YC 125

Villore IV - Highrise apartment of professional mind clash player Karese “Bombardier” Tolon

“H-Hey! S-Sorry for the wait… Y-You’re him? The person my coach recommended, right?”

“Suppose I am Mr.Tolon… My name is Valder Vasi… May I come in?”

“S-Sure, sure…”

< Valder stepping through the door >

< Tolon closing the door >

“… So uh… Is that the stuff?”


“Y-Your briefcase… Is that the stuff? You know, the goods…”

“… Is there anywhere we can sit down to discuss details, Mr.Tolon?”

“Oh! Y-Yeah! F-Follow me into the living room.”

“Of course… Are we alone in the house Mr.Tolon?”

“Y-Yeah, wife is out with the kids right now… I’d say we have about an hour before they show back up… F-Frankly I dont get why we had to do this at my home!”

“I wanted to make sure you would be in an environment where you can be comfortable, Mr.Tolon.”

“Just… Just feels dirty inviting a drug dealer into my home!”

“Drug dealer?”

“H-Hey I don’t mean that in a bad way! Just… you know! An observation!”

“… Mr.Tolon, I am not a drug dealer. I am a representative of an entity that can get you the help you need.”

“I’m s-sorry… I didn’t mean any offense! It’s just… how my coach explained you people made you sound like you were off the book types… You know what I mean?”

“I get what you mean…”

“Here, take a seat on the couch here… C-Can I get you anything? Water? Coffee? Quafe?”

"I’m good Mr.Tolon. Thank you.

“Cool! Um… Sooo… Where do we go from here?”

“…Are you in distress? Mr.Tolon?”

“It’s not you!.. I-I-I mean it is you! But also just… the migraines. O-Other things going on…”

“I understand… And before we start I would like to make it clear to you, that at any point that you have second thoughts or are just uncomfortable with this entire conversation. You can stop it any time. I’ll take my things and leave and we’ll pretend it never happened…”

“Okay… Y-You’ll just go?”

“I’ll just go. It’s that simple Mr.Tolon. This is your house, I am a guest that asked for permission to be here. You can revoke that permission at any time. Understand?”

"Y-Yeah…I do "


< Valdar popping open briefcase >

“Now, Mr.Tolon as I understand it from your medical diagnosis, you’re suffering from some brain trauma from your recent Mind Clash match, correct?”

“Wait you… Read the diagnosis?”

< Valdar shuffling papers around >

“Dr.Rouillon, yes? We acquired the information we needed to ensure little time is wasted in understanding your needs, Mr.Tolon.”

“T-The invasion of privacy ain’t really cool man!”

“I apologize for that, again - It’s just so we can act that much faster to relieve you of your problems. I assure you Dr.Rouillon was cooperative with this sharing of information.”

“T-That still doesn’t exactly fill me with much confidence…”

“I apologize. If you would like this end-”

“-NO! No… I… T-Tell me more. Please.”

“Very well… I haaaaave-”

< Valdar handing over some pieces of paper >

“-A few options you can take here. Give them a look for yourself.”


'If you have any questions, please ask. Though let me go ahead and inform you that option A here is a reliable and cost effective pain reliever. Perfect if you’re operating under a budget, Option B is a bit more pricey, longer working and stronger dosage…"

“A-Are these neural boosters?!”

“Yes they are Mr.Tolon.”

“Aren’t these… Illegal? And uh… Dangerous?”

“Depending on who you ask… Yes. To me? These are the means to fix your issues that the Federal healthcare system is too scared to fix themselves… It is after all why your coach directed you to us, no?”


“Please, continue looking over the options provided. If you have concerns about what exactly is in them you can find the list of contents in the bottom right…”

“Half this stuff I don’t even understand…”

“Quite alright Mr.Tolon. I can walk you-”

“L-Look… Its not just the migraines I’m struggling with… M-My problem is worse than just pain…”

“Care to elaborate?”

"I…I’m being told to retire… My doctor is telling me that if I continue to compete in mind clash I can risk severe brain damage… Paralyze myself or worse! I can feel it when I show up to practice… It’s unbearable! I… I can’t do it anymore! There’s no signs of my problems healing anytime soon and it’s… S-Scaring me… J-Just the other day I went to open a door and I couldn’t move my arm for a good five seconds… L-Like I would subconsciously think to move my arm like always only for it not to move… Then there’s the moments of episodes of dizziness and puking that follows soon after…”

“I see… So that Mind Clash match left you in this state?”

“That Sebiestor piece of ■■■■ Mitr “White Haze” Maver did this to me… First match I lose this season and that ■■■■■■■ animal continues to maul my mind as I tap-out, ignoring the referee! And does he get penalized? No! He walks away from that match and uses that incident to build his image up on the circuit as this savage mental warrior everyone should be weary to clash with!”

“I assume the heat of battle just got to him?”

"Fedoshit! He was out to injure me!.. I’ve clashed with some dirty players before who used cheap shots to get ahead… but that continued psyche-barrage after the match was called was something different. It was downright malicious! They had to ■■■■■■■ wheel me out on a stretcher… You wanna know my last memory of that match? The memory that tells me that this prick was out to injure me?”

“What would that be”

“Looking at the corner of my eye as I’m being rolled out and seeing that son of a ■■■■■ smiling…I swear to god I saw that piece of ■■■■ smile at me and I KNEW in that moment what really happened…”


“I’m twenty-eight… I’m in my prime and I’m suffering an injury that has ruined my career just as it was getting good… I’m a championship contender this year! I just know it! I’ve already fought some of the hardest clashers this cluster can muster and have softer targets lined up for me… I can make it to the finals this year but these ■■■■■■■ migraines… This threat of brain damage if I continue… I can’t let it end this way! I… Look, I have two kids, right?”


“A third is on the way… This home? This castle in the skies I’ve bought out to shelter them? All paid for with my earnings on the circuit… My entire life is financially propped up by my participation in mind clash… I have nothing else to look at in this world but mind clash. I’m a god damn drop-out with no other skillset that got really lucky with a sport… If an injury is stopping me from playing? I’m ■■■■■■… My family is ■■■■■■ and I’ll be nothing more than a cripple that cries in the middle of the night like a newborn about a pain nobody can stop…”

“I see…”

“So please, I… NEED something more than just something to mask the pain… Dr.Rouillon prescribed me something that helps other clashers, but it’s starting to do nothing for me… I would pop pills into my mouth like they were sour Quafe gummies and sometimes feel like the pain only got worse! Something is deeply wrong with me…”


< Valdar shuffling papers around >

“I’m grateful I had the foresight to bring this documentation along… Take a look at this…”

“What’s this?”

“Information regarding a unique procedure we can preform on you. Tailor made for mind clashers like yourself.”

“P-P-Procedure?! Look I just… I Expected you to take some blow out of your briefcase and tell me it will fix all my issues and not something like this…”

“I would never dare bring such substances to your place of residence Mr.Tolon.”

“B-But a ■■■■■■■ medical procedure? Who are you people?!”

“Not drug dealers.”

“But… W-What? I show to some shady back alley clinic and-”

“-Mr.Tolon, please… We have clinics that are maintained by respectable trained personnel no different to that you would find in any hospital you’ve been in. They’re safe, secure and clean and suitable for the clientele of your status to be seen in.”

“T-This just seem a little… I dunno, Crude?”

“Most medical procedures will appear that way. Unfortunate reality of healthcare.”

“I’m gonna be injected with all these kinds of boosters that are listed?”

"The list looks scary, but I assure you it’s nothing to be worried about. The procedure is perfectly safe and you’ll be unconscious for it.”


“You will be put into a medically induced coma for a week.”

“A week?!”

“We’re trying to lower the time needed with testing, but for safety reasons… A week.”

“I’m just… Suppose to disappear from the world for a week in some mystery clinic you people run?”

“Correct. There’s no other way sadly. These are our conditions for this treatment and we are unable to negotiate on them. If you’re concerned about the public media or your sponsors making queries into your disappearance, we will include an artificial medical history to provide documentation on plausible whitelist treatments you underwent to treat your injury.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean placing files here and there to build a narrative of treatments you undertook to bring you back to health. A doctor here, a referral there, prescription signed… You get the idea. The public media will be none the wiser and your sponsors will get to brag about your titanic recovery from a career ending injury.”

“B-But what’s the catch? I take this procedure and then what?”

“… You continue on being a mind clash player?”

“Fedoshit! There’s gotta be a catch to hook me in or whatever…”

“Besides paying, there isn’t anything else we will ask of you Mr.Tolon. it’s a hefty fee, but a fee that will be satisfying for us… We will go our separate ways when our business is concluded.”

“M-Money isn’t a concern. It’s just…”




“So… No more migraines?”

“No more migraines.”

“And I’ll be… Healed?”

“The boosters used in the procedure will be able to reverse the trauma you’ve suffered playing mind clash… You’ll practically feel like a brand new clasher again, just with the veterancy of a championship contender…”


“… And, you may find your performance enhanced post-procedure. The Sebiestor who did this to you? All tired out from a year long season? Would crumble next time he locked horns with you…”


“… If you need some time Mr.Tolon, We can-”

“No!.. I-I mean yes!.. Uh… I want the procedure! I…I want the pain to stop… I want to keep playing.”

“And win your first championship?”

“… Yeah. And with my first championship.”

“Should we schedule an appointment?”

“How soon can we begin?”

“Well… Tonight if need be. Though I’m sure you need to run things past your family first and let them know where you’ll be for a week.”

“T-Tomorrow morning… That’s all the time I need”

“Of course, I can have a car pick you up and take you directly to the clinic. I will inform your coach myself and fill him in on your decision. Let him handle public relations while you’re out.”

“O-Okay… C-Can I keep the papers?”

“Unfortunately, no Mr.Tolon. the papers come with me. I hope you don’t take offense, just policy to ensure clients don’t run off with sensitive material.”

“I-I understand… Here.”

“Thank you…”

< Valdar closing briefcase and standing up >

“Mr.Tolon, trade your anxiety for excitement because in a week from now, you’ll be a new man…. A new clasher. I look forward to seeing your career unfold moving forward.”

“T-Thank you…”

“In fact… Could I get your autograph?”

“O-Oh sure! Anything for my fans…I-I just better not see it for sale on the Galnet, alright?”

“Of course Mr.Tolon.”


“We’re not a drug cartel, we sell Recreational Compounds!” :rofl:

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