News reaches Gutter Press from Jachanu V, where melon farmers in the Upper Hemisphere have been celebrating following the end of a severe drought that had been threatening the melon crop for this season.
Drought !
An unusually long period of dry weather had occurred, and the melon growing districts had been suffering a prolonged drought, that irrigation systems had been struggling to mitigate, despite the efforts of several of the minor planetary Holders to increase irrigation capacity. Jachanu melons are a significant crop both within the Jachanu system and the Nohshayess constellation.
Rainfall !
A shift in the position of the Upper Hemisphere atmospheric jet stream, resulted in the drought breaking, with sustained rainfall over many days, bringing relief to the melon farmers, and refilling the regions aquifers and surface reservoirs. This sudden shift was found by meteorologists to have been caused by the emission of a colossal amount of water vapour from the seas to the west of the major continent in the Upper Hemisphere.
Steam !
Upon investigation by planetary authorities, it was found that the source of the water vapour was exhaust steam from a colossal steam organ constructed by a native Jachanu capsuleer on their private resort island. The steam organ, or calliope, used an antimatter reactor to generate staggering quantities of steam from seawater, in order to play music for the purposes of entertaining the capsuleers guests at parties, though the capsuleer noted that thus far they have not used it for that purpose, but were merely testing the newly constructed organ.
Music !
The capsuleer, who did not wish to be named by Gutter Press, related that the piece of music that they were using to test the instrument, and thereby inadvertently solve the drought, was “March of the Khanid Dragoons”, a nearly 2800year old regimental march from the Reclaiming era of Amarr Prime.
Residents of Jachanu V expressed a variety of opinions following this discovery:
“We prayed for rain, and our prayer was answered. God be praised”, said one farmer.
“Capsuleers and their whimsical nature doing something beneficial for a change ? Surprising”, opined a minor Holder
“March of the Khanid Dragoons ? That is a stirring patriotic tune indeed”, said a retired Khanid Navy officer.
“Who even builds steam organs these days ?” questioned a local musician.
In other news from the Kingdom, a motorcycle named in a divorce action on Afnakat X, was found to be a Cyberknight trapped in their vehicle form using an illegally modified TCMC. She was rescued by planetary police and returned to her family.
Gutter Press. News.