—
—"I’m not capable of doing this all on my own, I’ve needed people who are experienced and knowledgeable where I wasn’t. All I have really Is a vision, it is the people around me who make that vision a reality. I care deeply for each of them, and despite Utatis’ rough and mysterious demeanor… He’s someone I’ve seen as a person I can place my trust in. I’ve seen him more than just my employer, but as a friend. His advice and wisdom are more than any kredit I have at my disposal… Though sometimes I wonder if he’s hiding things from me.
- Suha Raibuya
“I was attacked by a staircase”
March 24th YC 123
6NJ8-V VII - Moon 2 - Guristas Logistic Support Station - Guristas Medical Treatment Center.
“Utatis! Are you… Feeling well?”
“… Well, my ribs are broken, doctors are unsure about my right arm healing properly, I got a concussion. My nose is broken, And I need the assistance of multiple painkillers to keep the pain down just enough for me to sleep… Am I feeling well?”
“…”
“No. I’m not feeling well Suha.”
“…I-I brought you some flowers!~”
“I can see that.”
“Just a little color to brighten things up here!~ Maybe the smell would help elevate a tiny amount of discomfort.”
“Sure, and maybe several shots of morphine.”
“…I-I’m sorry, was visiting you so soon the wrong thing to do? You seem agitated.”
“I am, but not at you.”
“Well that’s good I think… Erm… If u may ask Utatis… What happened?”
“… I fell.”
“You fe- Utatis! You expect me to believe you just slipped and fell?! You’re barely trying to hide this! Clearly you were attacked!”
“I was attacked by a staircase.”
“Please Utatis! I’m not a moron! I can see plainly you didn’t just fall and injury yourself so brutally… No, the only way this could have happened is if you were attacked.”
“…”
“You can tell me! I’m… Im not gonna think less of you after hearing you lost a fight.”
“So you were attacked! By who?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Yes it does! This attack on you is an attack on us all!-”
“No.”
"-We need to take action!-
“No.”
“-I can’t just let my agency director be assaulted and laid out in a hospital bed!”
“Yes - You can. And you will.”
“And why would-”
“-Because if you know what’s ■■■■■■■ good for you, you’ll stay out this and leave me to handle it myself.”
“…”
“…Sorry to have to snap at you like that.”
“It’s… It’s fine. I-I-I just want to help you Utatis! When I saw you stumble through the door all battered and bloody looking as if you just walked through a warzone, my heart stopped. I was scared Utatis, I didn’t know what was going on and I thought you were going to die right there on the floor!”
“You’ve done enough help simply getting me a bed in a Guristas medical center and not some shady back alley clinic ran by a doctor with an expired medical license… How’d you even managed this?”
“You bribed the administration to take me, didn’t you?”
“Well, I’d be lying if I said it didn’t help… Money is of no object when it comes to your wellbeing, Utatis! I wanted to make sure you got the best medical attention in a safe and secure location.”
“Yeah, doesn’t get more safer than this I suppose… Well, so long as nobody takes offense to me taking up a bed under a bribe you made with the admins.”
“Well, admittedly you’re on a low priority listing … You shouldn’t be in the way of any injured Guristas personnel that come through. That does mean however a slower treatment process…”
“Mhmm…”
“… So are you not going to tell me?”
“Like I said, stay out of it.”
"It’s Guristas, isn’t it?’
“Now what gives you that impression?”
“What gives me that impression? Because over, over and over again you ward me off from anything involving the Guristas!”
“This is true. Doesn’t necessarily mean this is the Guristas’ doing however… I just got some personal baggage I guess you could say.”
“Like what?”
“With all due respect ma’am? As my employer, I expect you to keep some boundaries when it comes to my personal life.”
“Is that all you see me as? Just some employer?”
“Well, yes. It’s only professional to look at it this way.”
“Well… I see you as something more than just an employee Utatis!”
“Aren’t you already seeing someone?”
“Not like that you smartass! I… Utatis I need you, you’re more important to this whole set up than I think you realize.”
“I think I’m well aware.”
“You should be! I’m talking beyond just the work you do fir the Agency too you’re… You’re someone I can really trust and depend on, Utatis.”
“…”
“I see you as something of an advisor! The amount of wisdom and advice you’ve given me has been invaluable. Avio… for as much as I love him for this, is always eager to say “Yes” to whatever plan I have, but you on the other hand are willing to tell me no when my plan is flawed.”
“Yes, without me there’s a good chance you’d have pissed in the Rabbit’s cereal by now thinking you were helping enhance the flavour of his morning corn flakes.”
“… Well that’s a curious way of putting it.”
“A rhetorical way of saying you would’ve crossed that line I talk about in an attempt to do something you think the Guristas would find helpful.”
“Do… Do you think anything I try to do is helpful to the Guristas?”
“Depends. Sometimes it’s helpful both directly and indirectly, other times it’s like they come into the kitchen in the middle of the night and find there’s macaroni noodles all over the goddamn floor and you hold up a piece of pasta art to show them how much you love them. It’s a heart warming gesture to help them overlook the mess. Which is a forgivable one, but annoying to clean up nonetheless.”
“You make me sound like a c-”
“-A child, yes. Precisely what I’m getting - A child that’s trying way to hard to act like one of the adults and stick your nose where it doesn’t belong.”
“…”
“Look… You just got done saying how much you value me for not being a Yes man like Avio. So don’t start getting upset with me about this…”
“Well… Tell me what you really think then Utatis!”
“You sure?”
“Y-Yes! Be honest with me”
“…Very well. You wanna know what I really think? I think you have no business with the Guristas.”
“…”
“You’re so intoxicatingly naive about these people and yet you try so desperately to be seen as one of them that frankly I’m struggling to figure out if I find it pitiful or just out right pathetic. Running headlong into some ■■■■ you don’t fully comprehend just yet. You try and worm your way into this organization with money, religion and your spreads, and ultimately I find what you’re doing is seeing how far you can test the patience of leadership before they have you killed. This is why I ward you off from getting involved in any Guristas matters - Because the second you start trying to get Involved with their volatile affairs is the moment your life is forfeit. The fact you’re still alive now is the gratitude you’ve wanted so badly from the Guristas. Your reward for your efforts? Their patience. You’re doing things so way out of your league and expertise that for every lucky success you have that reflect positively on you, you have a history of just as many incompetent stunts that begins to test that aforementioned patience the Guristas have for you…”
“… So you’re saying I’m not cut out for thi-”
“-No, you’re not.”
“…”
“…”
< Suha sniffling >
“No… Don’t start this now.”
< Suha lightly sobbing >
“I’m not apologizing…”
< Suha full blown crying >
“…”
“A-After all my efforts! After all this work! I’m still seen as some incompetent failure that has no place here? What a sick joke!”
“It’s the reality of the situation.”
“It’s not fair! I try to help build this region a prosperous future and I’m still just seen as a child that causes more problems than good?! Treated like some outsider?!”
“You’re taking my criticism a little too personal…”
“It’s not just your words… Others tell me the exact same thing. People who hated my guts, people who had high hopes for me and now you! I’d at least hope after how long you’ve worked in me you would’ve seen potential in me that they didn’t! I’d hope the reason you were so dedicated to your job was because you saw merit in the vision I had.”
“I do the job I’m given, not every job has me doing something I necessarily believe in. That said, it’s not my place to let my personal views get in the way of getting it done.”
“Oh well that’s just…. Fantastic! Truly!”
“I apologize for remaining a professional? About the only crime I’ve committed here.”
“Oh whatever!”
“…”
“…”
“… I take it I’m fired now?”
“… Fired? No… No of course not. Wouldn’t be very - professional - of me to do that over something like this.”
“It wouldn’t. I was honest with you just as you asked.”
“Yes… Now I have to ask if this is the reality of the situation, do i just… give up? Stop what I’m doing after all this effort?”
“If you wanna give up, that’s your call. Frankly I think it’s way too late for that, you’re in too deep as it is and you’re better off just riding it all out.”
“…”
“… If helping the Guristas is something you’re still so passionate about doing. Then you better realize that you’re right where the Guristas want you in order to do that… You’re incompetent at times, as I stated. Everyone benefits when you’re making these mistakes on your own dime and not theirs. Ontop of that you don’t want to be answering to these people directly, you don’t wanna have these expectations they have to be your responsibility… Would out take all the - fun - you’re having with this.”
“…”
“… I love the flowers by the way, they’re very a nice gesture.”
“… I think I should go. There’s still plenty of your work that needs to be taken care of.”
“If it makes it any easier on you, just send me any of the paperwork, I still got one good hand to sign with.”
“Oh no~ that won’t be necessary Utatis~. Please… Just rest up and get better soon, okay?”
“Assuming I do get any better…”