"You wanna buy this? Really?"

“This headpiece of mine is bit a trinket I’ve grown fond of…Apparently it holds some symbolic meaning in Amrrian culture, but I’ve not given any concern to such things. lt was given to me by a Guristas captain by the name of Reirold Honkashige who visited my colony to sell some of the spoils of his recent victories in space. When raiding a ship or station, there will always be small personal items like books, consumables, knick-knacks, porno-reel collections and other small trinkets that the previous owners no longer have need for…Raiding parties will take these small goods and either keep them for themselves, or try selling them back home in Venal…When I saw this headpiece, it caught my eye and I immediately wanted it, not for it’s meaning or symbolic nature…Just because I thought it was pretty and liked it, nothing more - nothing less …Though I’m very curious if Reirold would regret giving this to me if he saw how much Capsuleers are willing to pay for it.”

  • Suha Raibuya

“You wanna buy this? Really?”


February 10th YC 116


Guristas Agricultural Colony on Nsyan III - N5Y-4N, Venal region.


“Look Kogger, you buying the album or nah?”

“Hell no, not at that price! You gotta come down on that Reirold. A hundred script? You tripping!”

“Dawg, this is the ■■■■■■■ Lord Gozmos trilogy album, it’s a collector’s peice practically. We got Gambit Hustle, Thuck’Rucker inc., and Dirty Kreditz. That’s about fifty tracks total - not counting the three unreleased bonus tracks unique to this collection album.”

“Fifty script.”

“Now I know you ain’t about to start haggling with me. This ain’t no flea market!”

“This ain’t a retail store either! Come on Reirold, ain’t like you even paid for this ■■■■ in the first place.”

“Nah, but I did get shot in the leg raiding the ship this was on, so ■■■■ you - hundred script.”

“Look, I know I said I was desperate for new music, but I can’t afford to drop that much!”

“Well maybe if your broke ass got on a ship and started pulling in plunder like the rest of us, maybe you’d be able to afford it. Now either buy the album or move on, I ain’t got time for this ■■■■■■■■.”

“Are you crazy?! I have Asthma! I can’t even serve the militia unit here!”

“So what?! Kemba over there only gots one fuckin’ lung and he’s out pulling loot. ■■■■ you and your asthma, bitch. Get out of my face. You don’t even need this music, whatchu need is some godman lotion for your dry ass skin, check it, I got a big partially used bottle right here of some of that high grade ■■■■ that Amarrian holders use to smooth out their crusty ass wrinkly skin and gentiles.”

“■■■■ you Reirold! I’m gone.”

“Yeah aIight, whatever bitch. Keep on walking with your chump change and ashy skin…■■■■■■■ looking like the surface of Mannar Prime or some ■■■■, get the ■■■■ up on outta here with that…Man, broke bitches out in full force today! Damn.”

“Uh…Hey! Reirold…How have you been?”

“Who the f- OH ■■■■! well if it ain’t just my favorite customer! What’s good Suha?! God damn! You’re growing up quick too ain’t you!?”

“I uh…Guess so! I turned seventeen last month…”

“Ah ■■■■, I’m sorry kid, I missed the party then!”

“No-No! It’s fine! You’re off being busy and helping bringing in more wealth for our people.”

“Damn straight I am!..Ayo! No way! You’re packing heat now Suha?”

“Huh? Oh! Yeah I’ve advanced in my training and I’ve been issued a non-lethal blaster and holster to carry around on me.”

“Non-lethal? That still wicked kid, mind if I see what you got?”

“Eh…Well…Akko sorta made it very clear to me that he doesn’t want to see or hear of me unholesting it tt just to show off to anyone. If he does, he says he’ll use it on me as punishment…Already had to be zapped by it once for training, rather not do it again as a punishment.”

“Man, Akko needs to get that stick out of his ass for once.”

“I know! He’s such a dick!…Ah…”

“Ha! Don’t worry, I haven’t seen his ugly ass mug anywhere around here for the past three hours since I’ve set up shop - Speaking of which! how about we talk business!? See anything you like?”

“Well…No sadly. N-Not to disrespect your haul! You’ve fought hard for your spoils and all…I just…Don’t see anything that I really want.”

“Well I can help with that! You trying to buy this Lord Gozmos Trilogy Album?”

“Lord who?”

“Yeah never mind that…Uhhhh what else, what else…Hey! You like to read, right?”

“Sure, it’s something to do.”

“Well you’re in luck! I got this sweet ass collection of books I got off this holder’s ship. Right here in this crate, look at these…these…dusty ass books! Now I don’t know a single ■■■■■■■ one of these books or the contents within, but let’s check out…This one! Check it! There’s a ■■■■■■■ giant ass space battle on the cover! That makes it badass by default! Let’s just open up a page right now, get a taste for the adventure that awaits you in…this…book…uhhhh.”

“Reirold?”

“…You can read Amarish, right?”

“No.”

“Son of a bitch! Alright, forget the books! ■■■■ reading anyway, don’t need that ■■■■. How about a holoreel! In fact, I got one in mind that’s just perfect for you just lemme uh…No…No, not that one…No, no, no you’re not old enough for this one…Or this one…God dammit, this is all just ■■■■■■■ porno-reels! Hey Kemba! Did we have another box of holoreels anywhere?!”

“Yeah! It’s by your feet dumbass!”

“By my fe-? Oh! ■■■■! Here we go Suha, this has to have the reel I had in mind for you…Before we go any further though…You trying to buy some porn?”

“Uhhhhh.”

“I’m just asking! Alright? You’re growing lass! You got…needs. nothing weird about it, only human nature.”

“I-I think I’ll pass…”

“Okay! No pressure!..The collection we got is some nasty ■■■■ anyway, I’m not one to kink shame or anything, but the captain of this Quafe cargo ship was some kind of freak with the ■■■■ he’s watching.”

“Good to…know? Uh…About that holoreel you had in mind?”

“Yeah-Yeah-Yeah, I’m looking for it…Here we go! Check this out. A holoreel with all twenty-six episodes of Null-Bastards! Including special features and behind the scenes content.”

“Never heard of it, why would I want this?”

“Well this is the kind of stuff that ends up getting played in the cantinas of Gurista bases all over. Action drama series of a crew of pirates just trying to carve out a life - only lasted for two seasons, pretty ■■■■■■■ cheesy stuff, but hey - this is the kind of media Gurista troops consume. And well, you’ve always showed eagerness to sign on when you got older. So…Just figured it’s something you’d like.”

“…”

“Something wrong?”

“I just…Don’t think this is for me either, sorry.”

“What do you mean it’s not for you? You’ve pestered me every time I’ve visited about “life among the ranks” and the ■■■■■■■■ we’re up to in our spare time between operations. Telling me about how you were looking forward to signing on and getting aboard a ship.”

“I-I know! I know…Just…Maybe I’m not cut out for that life?”

“Well…What gives you that impression?”

“Akko constantly tells me that I wouldn’t be able to make it with the Guristas military. That I’d embarrass myself in basic training and wouldn’t have the guts to do what is necessary. And as much as I think he’s a massive dick, he was a Guristas captain for a couple years…Hard to say he doesn’t know what it takes to fight for the Guristas.”

“…He’s…He’s not entirely wrong Suha.”

“Oh…”

“You gotta have a stomach for this line of work, you gotta have no hesitation either. When it’s go time - it’s ■■■■■■■ go time, bullets are gonna start flying and people are gonna start dying. It can be an extremely stressful for even the hardest motherfuckers in this cluster.”

“Is it stressful for you?”

“Damn right it is - but that’s what the afterparty is for when the job is done, blow off all the steam and forget i was even strung out to being with. Every ■■■■■■■ score I’m in could end with my death or worse, imprisonment…Hell! The ship I’m on could be scrapped by some Capsuleer that stumbles into a refuge or hideaway we’re docked at. I’d say I’m blessed to be alive and free for as long as I’ve been…On top of that, you gotta work alongside some questionable ■■■■■■■ people, alright? It’s just the truth of the matter - there’s some ■■■■■■■ dirtbags I’ve had to split the loot with more times than I can count. Real assholes…And to just be honest? I can’t see you mixed in with that crowd.”

“Well what should I do? I want to help and give back to the Guristas! Do more than just…plow fields and tend to livestock. I wanna help liberate assets from the State! Or the Federation!”

“I like your fire, kid! As I said though…Vast majority of the people that make up the Guristas are some rough suspects. Lot of them are people who don’t have anything to lose and won’t hesitate to kill someone when the order drops…You ask me? What you should do is just live in bliss, you got good here kid. I’ve worked with plenty of nasty motherfucekrs that would kill to grow up somewhere as peaceful as this…Then again these are the same motherfcukers will kill for a crate of Quafe, so…”

“Living here my whole life living in “bliss” sounds like an uneventful existence…”

“Sometimes an eventful life ain’t what it’s cracked out to be. You do well to keep that in mind…”

“If you say so…Thanks for showing me this, but I think I’ll pass.”

“You sure? Alright no worries…Though I don’t know what else I can show you…”

“Sorry, I think I’ll just save my script this time aro-…Hey! What’s that?”

“What’s what?”

“That! On the mannequin head on the table behind you?”

“…Oh! This thing?”

“Yeah! Can I see it up close?”

“Uh…Sure!”

“…”

“…”

“It’s…Very pretty! What is it?”

“This here is some prestigious headpiece high-status women in the Amarr Empire wear that’s made out of jade stone. Was popular fashion among Capsuleers too until they vanished off their heads sometime in YC 113. Apparently the design of this “Blade” headwear is based off some ancient Amarrian ■■■■■■■■ and has some symbolic meaning to it…I don’t even know how to read their books so…Don’t ask me.”

“How much for it?”

“You wanna buy this? Really?”

“Yeah!”

“Well…Ten thousand script.”

“Ten thousand!?..I-I don’t…Have that much.”

“Ah…Well, sorry kid. It’s quite a rare piece you see, could be a big pay day if I can find someone with pockets as deep as the holder who this originally belonged to.”

“No-No, I understand Reirold…Thank you!..Well, I-I guess I’ll just see you next time Reirold.”

“Yeah…Alright, see you next time Suha.”

“…”

“…God dammit. Hey Suha! Come back!”

“Huh?”

“You heard me! Come back over here…”

“Something wrong?”

“…You…You really like this, right?”

“Well…Yeah! It’s nice and I’d like to own it.”

“Alright well…Take it.”

“…Take it?”

“Yeah! Just…Take it, it’s yours kid.”

“…I-I-I mean are you sure? I have about fifty script I can gi-”

“Just take it, no money needed.”

“Why? Weren’t you hoping to sell this for a big payday?”

“Honestly I don’t think I’m gonna find a ■■■■■■■■■■■■ in this whole region who’s gonna drop the coin on this piece…Ain’t exactly Gurista fashion, you dig? Besides, not like I paid for it…”

“I don’t know what to say…Except thank you! Of course…”

"Don’t mention it, consider it a…Belated birthday present!

“Well…Thank you! Thank you so much!”

“Don’t mention it…Run along now! And take good care of it!”

“I will! Thank you so much!”

“…”

“…You know she looks like a clown wearing that ■■■■, right?”

“Hey Kemba, how about I cut your last remaining lung out? How about that ■■■■■■■■?”

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Your stuffs always a very enjoyable read, thanks

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