I’ve done it.
Congratulations Aiko.
As many now realize with amazement and even shock, I defeated the permabanned racists and isk grubbing gankbears, in order to create my own personal vision of the New Order. I vowed that no longer would Highsec ganking be subject to the depraved megalomaniacal whims of an alcoholic multiboxer, or some boomer bittervet roleplay betabear orbiter. Instead, the future would belong to me.
When @Helicity_Boson and the @The_Mittami first envisioned Hulkageddon, they knew that the fate of the Imperium (indeed, the galaxy) would depend on whomsoever destroyed the most Hulks. They watched with trepidation, knowing that an uncouth ganker might seize the alltime record, although prophecies foretold of a beautiful Khanid princess to come. A lot of people didn’t believe that I, a mere girl from Agil-III, could climb the ladder of ganking success… yet here I am, at the very top. Of course, @James_315 always believed in me.
James wrote about me, way more than he ever wrote about you, because he saw in me the exemplary ganker. He knew that many former fans would harbor terrible miner thoughts about me, and he also knew that I was his beloved and most favourite star. Indeed, I have earned every praise ever uttered. The title of Hulkageddon Grand Champion is one that I will wear with pride and grace, smugly remembering the wannabes who started this race more than a decade before me, yet were not good enough to prevent me from eclipsing them for all eternity. Enjoy my friend, knowing that you are not the best, and you never ever will be.
To commorate this great victory, I will wear an equally great medallion next to the soul pendant of Viirilithizu, and I reveal to you now the prize which I have so clearly earned. Behold, my medal of utter and unconditional success!
Once again, congratulations Aiko, for all of EvE Online stands in utter awe, realizing that while many spun their ships and lounged on tether, sucking up isk and whining on Reddit, Aiko Danuja was always destined to be better than everyone else in every way, and we honor me today with a glorious triumph!
o7 Princess Aiko!
ＰＲＡＩＳＥ ＡＩＫＯ！