I would like to provide an official response to the Brutor Clans on my home planet of Matar who have expressed distaste over my arranging an “unseemly” mud-wrestling event involving myself and several other pilots.
Wrestling is a time-honored sport in many areas of our cluster, and as such, provides a unique and entertaining manner in which to celebrate the similarities and differences among cultures, such as those among the diverse group of capsuleers who have volunteered (or been volunteered) to wrestle, often with the intention of donating any funds won to charities.
The inclusion of mud in this event is often considered a perversion, but it in fact provides an additional challenge in defeating one’s opponent. All involved expect this special event to be a welcome diversion, a celebration of unity and strength.
As such, I see no reason to cancel the mud-wrestling event, unless my fellow capsuleers change their minds about it. For now, we invite everyone to join us for the matches, which would likely take place in August. More specifics will be announced as they are determined.
I hope that this explanation appeases the concerns of my honored Brutor neighbors. Having presented my views, I will close my statement with a small concern of my own, addressed to the selfsame Brutor clans:
Who even asked you though?
Warmest regards from the steppe,
Cadet Chief, on behalf of Clan Ramijozana