Cross-cultural Tattoo Causes Problems for Gallente Exotic Dancer!


(Muck Raker) #1

Astonishing news reaches Gutter Press from the Aydoteaux system in Everyshore, on the border with Amarr space, where an unusual tattoo has caused considerable problems for a local exotic dancer !

Symbology !

Unlike other tattoos that have caused problems for exotic dancers, the symbols in question do not come from the Minmatar culture, but instead, from the Amarr culture, and the religious iconography used has caused incredible difficulty for Sophie Lacroix, the dancer at the centre of the incidents.

Mysticism !

Ms. Lacroix revealed to Gutter Press agents, that an Amarr religious tattoo that she had commissioned, featuring an all-seeing Eye, recently started talking to her, and other nearby people, causing her much consternation !

Speech !

According to Ms. Lacroix, she had decided to get an Amarr-themed tattoo, on account of the numerous Amarr trading ships that frequently stop at the stations in Aydoteaux prior to crossing the border to Girini-Fa.

“I decided that a religiouslike tattoo would be pretty neat, and maybe the Amarr sailors might give better tips, so I go down to the Amarr section of the station, and there’s this tattoo shop there, so I go in, and there’s this red-skinned horned girl there, which I thought were totally sweet bodymods, and she asked what I wanted, so I said I wanted an awesome religious tattoo, maybe some scripture stuff on it, and she showed me some designs, and I picked out this one with the eye. Then about a week later, it starts talking at me, calling people sinners and stuff. I go back there, and the red girl like, literally hisses at me and says ‘no refunds!’ and that was that”

Poor customer service !

The tattoo, on Ms Lacroix’s lower back, gave its name as “Servant of Qetesh”, and asked if the Gutter Press agent wanted to convert to the “True Faith”, but declined to answer more advanced questions.

Mystery !

Gutter Press agents approached a number of experts in cryptodemonology for their opinion.

“Who are you and how did you get in here ?” said controversial philosopher Dr. Valate.
“Qetesh, you say ? Not a name I’m familiar with. Possibly a minor demon, you know, one of Molok’s lot”, said a more reputable theologian from Hedion University.
“Lower back tattoos are the Sign of a LUST DEMON”, opined a Khanid theologian.
"

Controversy !

While the tattoos presence does cause some concern, Ms. Lacroix has found one benefit. “My accountant says I should be able to register my tattoo as a dependent on my tax return, which will really help my financial planning.”

Gutter Press. News.


(Tyrel Toov) #2

Gutter Press. The news you never knew you needed.


(Valerie Valate) #3

Given that I was in my bathtub at the time, I feel my response was perfectly reasonable.

That said, getting a tattoo from a red-skinned, horned, girl, is just asking for trouble. They’re either a demon, or pretending to be a demon. Either way, that spells trouble.


(Rana Ash) #4

So i say drugs, yup thats what it is…


(Lauralite Anne Brezia) #5

I’m… not sure whether to laugh or not.


(Valerie Valate) #6

Why not both ?


(Arrendis) #7

My question is: how’s it speaking? It’s an eye, not a mouth.


(Valerie Valate) #8

Magic.


(Nana Skalski) #9

Too much Vherokior herbal tea? :thinking:


(Jade Blackwind) #10

I’d buy out that girl. She’ll make a fine addition to my hangar personnel in Jita, and talking tattoos are cute. Maybe I’ll even have a word with the “Servant of Qetesh”? 1m ISK to whoever owns her or to her if self-employed.


(Arrendis) #11

Said about a Gallente woman, living in Gallente high-sec.


(Mai Hantaka) #12

Pics or it didn’t happen.


(Jade Blackwind) #13

There’s almost always a “protection service”. Of varying degrees of protection. Yes, even in highsec. Probably tied to the local Angels/Serps/Syndicate - whoever holds the place. Need I explain in detail how that works?

1m ISK to let a single worker go is more than enough. And if she is a lucky self-employed one, then she’ll be happy to get those ISK to move to Jita and serve me.

If she exists, of course. :smile:


(Arrendis) #14

A nullsec cartel operating a ‘protection service’ for exotic dancers working either planetside or on a corporate-owned station in a 0.7 system?

There’s a lot of small-time baseliner gangs that might be doing that kind of thing, but really, the idea that every strip club in New Eden is connected to one of the major criminal cartels… that’s just absurd on the face of it.


(Jade Blackwind) #15

Not every club, but chances are there.

And a small baseliner gang running a strip club should sell the club and their collective souls for the money I’m offering.


(Utari Onzo) #16

The Blood of the Gallente gives Cholesterol
The Tattoo of the Gallente gives Sage Advice


(Valerie Valate) #17

Angles are never far… :face_with_raised_eyebrow:


(Rinai Vero) #18

Seems more like a consumer protection issue than a cross-cultural problem.


(Arrendis) #19

Awwww… dat’s acute.


(system) #21

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