"Look, we're libertarians, but we still got rules."

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“The Prosperity Network is a digital marketplace that enables anyone and everyone in the region to easily advertise things they have for sale and to search for the things they need to buy. In managing this platform we try to have as little Involvement as we can in the transactions between users… However in staying out of it completely and not enforcing any rules on the users could lead to some serious problems in the service’s quality. We still have standards afterall, and thus prevent the sales of questionable “goods” and make sure those trying to exploit the platform with deceitful tactics are removed. This could be in the form of a simple ban or… Something more direct.”

  • Utatis Parinen

“Look, we’re libertarians, but we still got rules.”


October 4th YC 122


P-VYVL VII - Moon 1 - Guristas Assembly Plant, rented storage unit on level Gamma-2B


“Hey! Get off me prick!”

“Geldere stay on him…”

“■■■■ you! One-eyed peice of ■■■■! Who the ■■■■ are you?”

“My name is Utatis Parinen. And you must be Beldr Amusi? A.K.A DeadWeight, A.K.A Slickmoney22, A.K.A BigChestSarum, A.K.A… Frankly you get the point now, yeah? Be here all day if I go down the entire list of aliases you’ve used to dodge bans on the Prosperity Network…”

“I don’t know the ■■■■ you-”

“Vevren! Open that crate over there!”

“Yes sir.”

“HeyHeyHey! Don’t go snooping around in my ■■■■!”

“You hiding something?”

“■■■■ you!”

< Crate lid pried open >

“Hand me one of whatever is inside it, will you?”

“Here you are sir.”

“Thank you… Now Beldr… What is this?”

“… That’s a premium Fabuluex fur coat - YC 119 Fall Edition.”

“Incorrect, this is infact a knock-off. A poorly disguised one at that if you just glance at the branding on the collar here… The font is completely off and doesn’t have the artsy fruity writing style that actual Fabulex products have. And don’t get me started on this fabric and material. I’ve felt carpets more smooth and soft than this ‘fur’ coat. And ontop of that, this coat is a knock-off of the fur coat in YC 118 Winter catalog.”

“… How the ■■■■ do you kn-”

“I’ve done my research… All part in tracking you and your operation here down.”

“What for?!”

“Don’t play dumb… Figured the first series of bans would’ve gotten the message across that your tactics on our marketplace isn’t appreciated… You’re selling knock-off bootleg clothing, electronics, and holo-reels on our platform and advertising them as the real thing when selling them. Should you have advertised them as bootleg imitations of the real things in the tirstno, you peddle it as the real thing at a lower price to capitalize on people wanting the branding, but also wanting to spend as little money as possible to get it. If you just advertised we wouldn’t have a problem - but deceiving users like this for so long is unacceptable…”

“■■■■■■■■! I thought this network was supposed to be a free market! Those too stupid to make their purchases consciously don’t deserve their money in the first place.”

“Look, we’re libertarians, but we still got rules.”

“■■■■ you scarface!”

“Mhmm.”

“Who the ■■■■ even are yall? You Guristas?”

“Me? Not anymore… My associates here? No. We’re from the Venal Prosperity Agency.”

“Not actual Guristas then huh? Bunch of frauds running around raiding storage holds like they own the damn place.”

"We’re here in the interests of the service we provide to this region. You being one of the most egregious offenders on our platform demands we take a more hands-on approach if we wish to ensure quality on the Prosperity Network. The owners of the station will understand…

“So what? You gonna kill me over selling a bunch of fake coats to dipshits?”

“Oh no, can’t do that… However, we can blow this entire stockpile of goods you have here up with one well placed explosive.”

“…You’re kidding. You’re not even gonna take the stuff for yourself? Just… Destroy it all? And let me live at the same time? The ■■■■ is even the point?”

“To send a message. Consider your accounts - and yes, that was plural - with the Prosperous Venal depository frozen-”

“-Ayo, what the ■■■■?!”

“-And any remaining product in Depository holdings seized and handed off to the administration of this station to chalk what’s about to happen as a “accident” and go on about our days.”

“T-This is ■■■■■■■■! You can’t do this!”

“You used - our - service. Like I said, we’re libertarians, but still got rules. It’s more or less the only thing we ask of its users in exchange for providing a quality service. And if elements are bringing that quality into question… Well, I don’t really believe in ‘right and wrong’ but I’d say we’re in the right at the moment…”

“Why let me live?! You’re just gonna take everything and toss me to the side to defend some idiots with a lot of money, vanity and incompetency?”

“… Yes.”

< Beldr spitting >

“…”

“Well there’s something to shine your shoes with bitch! A white knight like you can’t be looking some dusty, bummy homeless one eye-ed pirate after all.”

“…”

“… Look, consider yourself in a lucky position because despite barging in here like I own the place, we’re still in no position to start walking around whacking Gurista. Ontop of that we think this is a more polite way of getting a point across to whatever cell you belong to that we don’t appreciate how you’ve abused our service.”

“Guristas? Man ■■■■ you, I ain’t one of you bitch boys. I’m with the Cartel!”

“Angel? Well… In that case.”

“H-Hey what a mi-”

< Bolt Pistol Discharge >

“… Now that’s taken care of.”

“…”

“… Take a look around, search the crates for what else this prick was moving. Everyone gets the choice of two crates, claim what you want and torch the rest.”

< Prosperity Agents cheering and scrambling >

“Remember the rules!”

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There never were any rules, just punishment.