OP, I’m sorry to say, but you’re wrong on pretty much every point you made (except one, which I’ll get to in a second).
I’ll give you one tip, exactly one, since you should be able to learn stuff like fitting and strategy on your own: you need to find a reason to PvP.
PvP in EVE is a means to an end, not an end in itself (which is common to generic multiplayer PvP games like shooters). Fighting has to intend to accomplish some kind of goal to make you better off in the game compared to before. Maybe it’s loot, or better stats, or respectability, but it has to be something. If you only fight for the sake of fighting and throwing a “gf” in local without thinking about it, you likely will never make it past a certain level of skill, and more importantly, personal satisfaction.
Of course the goal can be to learn how to fight better, in which case it’s acceptable to go out and look for fights for the sake of fighting alone, for a while. But at some point you’ll have to move past that, and turn your eye into growing your own empire.
And you need to drop your notion of the existence of “griefing” ASAP. It doesn’t actually exist, and thinking this way is holding you back right now.
Then you make them think that they can win. This type of social engineering is one of the most important skills required for being a good PvPer.
I do agree with this part. The standings system is terrible, and pushes you toward having dedicated characters for specific tasks. Which, quite honestly, is likely by design, since CCP would absolutely love it if everyone paid for dozens of alts.