The Case for Catizstag - irrelevant Amarr Militia drama

729 spacepeople,

I call attention to these facts: first. the Empress Catiz I’s beauty, being only rivalled by that of her predecessor, her holiness Empress Jamyl Sarum I, and the prophetesses Anoyia and Kuriya; and her industriousness being unmatched even by the most attentive of krabs or korps in the depths of Imperium space, as well as her well known exhibition of the desire to maintain a stable and healthy warzone status for baseliners at the cost of Empyrean battles, under the authority of the great Amarr commander Gian Bal, who is always completely dedicated to the Empress and at her disposal, as well as all of the other great, moral, ethical, holy and noble paladins of the Amarr Empire who have given their lives and blood for the Empire, such as Varrinox, edeity, Tristan daCuhna and many others…

As well as these points, the fact that the name Arzad is disliked by many in the Republic due to distant historical events of minor consequence…

Knowing all of this we respectfully request that the system of Arzad be renamed Catizstag in order to provide solace and comfort to those subjects under the skies of what should formerly be named Arzad, ruled by Empyrean battles. It would forever stand as a reminder to the Republic that we truly wish for a new era of industry - if not of peace, at least of mutual assured destruction that is completely sustainable, since as Empyreans we cannot actually die and most of the work out here is done in 1-man frigates.

The cool cats of ARZAD also request that Arzad II be renamed LAVALAND, As this is at least as historically relevant as the Republic’s request to rename it to whatever it was they wanted to rename it to…

When you kill a POCO, and put up your own POCO, you get to name it what you want, or you sell it to someone else…it’s the same thing with planets, basically. So, seeing as how it was the Ardishapur family under the Hamri Holder clan that claimed it by “divine right” - probably just consequentialism and egoistic anarchism - no matter -that took over the planet, our request is just as valid, if not more valid than the Republic’s request to rename it even though they were clearly the owners of the “POCO” that got destroyed, not the individual that replaced it, which held the name of the Arzad family, its holders…

Some might argue, well “They were human beings” but what is a human being, exactly, in the face of the might of some of the civilizations which have arisen, remain standing, and have fallen in New Eden?

8 Likes

This has merit.

7 Likes

Yes, make it more of a morale loss for your people when the tlf tires of you occupying it and takes it back.

5 Likes

My people? I assure you that the Society has little interest in this playground skirmish, in and of itself. It’s fun, of course. As for the Amarr, they’re simply playing a game of cat and mouse with Ushra’khan. Amarr leadership knows how much it means to them…considering they’ve held the system for quite some time and it’s TMOCC’s staging system…in this case the Amarr are the cat.

Empyreans need playtime to keep them occupied and Amarr needs Empyreans to hold the warzone. Gian isn’t stupid, he knows exactly how to supply that sort of playtime…by inciting constant rage in the enemies of the Empire.

Fascinating isn’t it? It’s this sort of low, instinctual and emotional activity that humans seem to need to continue enjoying an eternity…at least until the universe ends. Emotions just feeding upon each other…the key is the delicate balance between objective reality and incitement of emotions.

3 Likes

Could you possibly have chosen a system for this proposal that would have been more offensive than Starkman Prime? It’s bad enough it still bears the ‘Arzad’ name.

Yes, “Lavaland” is clearly as historically relevant as restoring the name of the place where the Starkmanir genocide took place. As for this nonsense…

Arzad Hamri was the Amarr noble who the Empire had executed for heresy because he respected his Starkmanir slaves and treated them well enough to incorporate their own teachings and beliefs into his personal life. He was tried and executed for treason. There is no Arzad family.

If you’re going to be offensive and dismissive of crimes against humanity, try not to be stupid about it.

5 Likes

I think you have high hopes of one who considers pirates and blooders their ethical superior.

1 Like

WOAH I don’t hang out with blooders. WHAT?!

4 Likes

edeity’s a Blooder.

6 Likes

Edeity is not a blood raider. How dare you.

5 Likes

Edeity is not a blood raider

6 Likes

And you’re not the brain-dead morons behind ‘the Arzad family’.

3 Likes

Edeity is not a blood raider.

6 Likes

Edeity is a champion of King Khanid!

Edeity is not a blood raider.

5 Likes

Oh dear, look at all the worms crawling out in his defense. That’s quite adorable, keeping in mind the whole sacrifice thing with his name plastered all over it.

4 Likes

Sacrifices to the Lord YOUR GOD in the name of righteousness is not against our religion, infidel. :sparkling_heart:

3 Likes

Edeity is not a Blood Raider.

6 Likes

The 24th Imperial Crusade has become a mockery of the faith. All of you pledging support for sani sabik filth, a man who vocally proclaims support of Omir Sarikusa, name yourselves heretics to Holy Amarr and traitors to God. You bind yourselves to pain and oblivion when His Judgment finally finds you.

The Lord your God does not tolerate blood sacrifices, you witch.

15 Likes

At least this thread’s subject line is not false advertising.

See, I can say nice things!

5 Likes

I was in bed, having a really fun dream about cake, and just as it was getting to the good bit, I was rudely awakened by my servant, who said “Terribly sorry to disturb you ma’am but there is a God at the door”.
“Tell them I’ve already got one” I said blearily. “He is most insistent.” replied my servant. “Fine” I said, putting on my dressing gown so as to be respectable, I usually just wear a nightgown in bed, unlike say Gallente ladies who just wear a smile.
So when I got to the door, there was God, which I wasn’t really expecting at that time of day, and He said to me “edeity is not a Blood Raider” to which I responded “Well I knew that already, he’s not in the Covenant after all. Was that all?”, to which God added “and neither is Anyanka Funk”, and then He said “Good day madam.”, then left.
My servant then asked if I was going back to bed, and I said “well I’m up now, make me some breakfast, I’m going to post on the IGS”

4 Likes

And let’s face it, folks: If Valate says it, you know it’s wrong.

3 Likes